Monday, November 26, 2012

Knots

Sweeping out from behind the newly moved sofa, I find pony tail holders, dog bones, pens, dust bunnies, memories both sad and happy all etched with a feeling of loss and sorrow.  The house grows empty.  It is begins to echo as it detaches from our family, piece by piece.

The Dad's heart is heavy as he stops for a hug.  "We are okay?", I ask.  He nods the affirmative.  "Then what else matters?" We keep moving forward.  This is but another death.  A dying to self and the past.  It is a visible reminder of what could have been different.

The girls hang around much longer than normal before going back to school.  They want to see their home one more time before they go.  They have worked so hard to help us move.  My heart is heavy for what they have had to go through.

Son calls from rehab.  I don't know what he really feels yet.  I don't think he does either.  I am thankful that he is not here, now.

These problems of ours seem to have grown using  compound interest.  They have become tangled and knotted into such a mess that when one is resolved three new problems are revealed.  One very dark and worrisome day, I googled novena for drug addiction and I stumbled upon this novena titled Mary Undo-er of Knots.  I began praying it and have found great comfort in it as well as tremendous helps in these difficult times.  You can find the prayers here.

Today, I say a prayer of thanksgiving for the gifts of the church.  I am thankful for all of the resources available to those who suffer from the disease of addiction.  I pray for their recovery and their families who support them.  And, I say a prayer for Henry.



2 comments:

Anonymous said...

My prayers are with you.

Your faith will get you through this rough patch.

Thank you for the novena; i will start mine today.

Annette said...

Leaving your home is so hard. But you will mourn that loss and heal and create a new home, with new memories. In time you will look back and see good in the midst of the loss.