Thursday, September 27, 2012


A good friend of mine who blogs, here, is mom to eight children.  Three are biological and five are adopted.  She has become quite the student of attachment theory.  As the years have gone by I've heard more and more about attachment, dealing with with a host of things besides adoption.  Seems we all need some attachment to someone we can rest assured that will love us and be there....always, no matter what.

I started hearing about attachment from the books written by Gabor Mate, MD, on children with ADD and addiction.  Then hubby and I began marriage counseling and our LCSW uses attachment therapy.  I didn't look for that but it's where God sent us. This summer I read Greg Boyle, SJ's Tattoo's on the Heart, a book about his ministry with former gang members.  His number one advice is to repair the attachment. 

Now, my friend (we have always said that we live parallel lives) gives me all of these DVDs on a conference led by Dr. Karen Purvis, dealing with healing the traumas that have caused a failure to have secure attachments.  Dr. Purvis is a psychologist at Texas Christian University.  She is amazing.

One of the messages she shares, that I really liked so much is this, the good news is the bad news:  the brain is plastic.  It can be changed; for the good or the bad.  But, what it means for me is there is hope for recovering what might have been lost.  It isn't easy or perfect but it is possible!!

I'll try to share a few things I'm learning along the way in my next few posts. Today I am thankful for hope.  It is a marvelous thing.  I'm thankful for a second chance of sorts.  I'm thankful for the time at the county jail.  Those ladies teach me so much.  I pray for more knowledge needed for healing.  I pray for the patience, strength and perseverance to carry out God's will.  And, as always I pray for the soul of Henry.

1 comment:

luluberoo said...

When I write about family systems, I absolutely believe we are capable of changing dynamics and healing. People are very resistant to the message their family communication style could be improved. That their actions can have an effect on the addict/alcoholic.

You are open and teachable. You want to use all the tools available. You go girl, and I'm off to find out more about Dr Purvis.