Monday, July 2, 2012

Battle Fatigue

I'm  feeling so tired.  I guess a long weekend and poor diet aren't as easily forgiven by the body as they used to be.  I took a little weekend get away to visit with my friend Lou.  Our visit was really good. But, my expectation for the whole weekend was that I would get caught up on reading and wriitng and that didn't happen.  It's left me, as hubby would say, full of piss and vinegar. 

Today I took my car to the dealership ( I know the dealership is the most expensive place) but it was for a recall or a reprogramming of something or other.  I could not renew my tags because the check engine light was on.  Half way home from the dealership, the check engine light came on again.  So when my daughter comes home, I will drive back again to drop off the car this time.

My head and heart are at a battle of tug of war as to what or how much to do for my son.  I am so tired of the constant analysis of what my motives are.  I want to just be for a while.

I guess I am full of piss and vinegar today.  I think I need physical and spiritual rest. 

Today I say a prayer of thanksgiving for my friends both near and far.  I am thankful for this blog and how it helps me to sort my feelings.  I pray for our addicted loved ones....that they might feel the restorative love that we have for them and that they may rest in it today.  And, I say a prayer for Henry. 


luluberoo said...

Oh dear, now I feel guilty you didn't accomplish what you had expected. I feel rested..even though my Smooch kept me running around.

The sons..sigh..I don't know. Mine is out, but our situation is very cut and dry. He went downhill fast, and is not interested in getting back on track. You are out of sorts, but I'm just jaded. Too many times around this same block for me.

Hattie Heaton (Mom of an Addict) said...

NO don't feel guilty...I didn't get anything done because my family didn't understand it was a work weekend and not a family visiting weekend....hard to get a work weekend to fly when staying with family. Sorry about Andrew. I've not circled the block nearly as many times but I'm just as tired of the trip.

Terri said...

I can so relate! I don't know how many times my plans have been side lined by someone else's. You need some you time.

Hattie Heaton (Mom of an Addict) said...

Thank you Terri....I'm working on it.

Annette said...

Hattie, I hear you.
Lou, WHAT?!