Monday, July 8, 2013

Just Another Step in the Slog

Hopefully one week from today, we will close on a house.  We thought that we would close thirty days ago but that fell through as we could not get the low rate we tried to get.  Now it looks as if every I has been dotted and every T crossed and every inspector or appraiser has looked at every possible liability and turfed it to the next expert in that field and maybe we are at the end of the line....maybe.  And, this is a new house....I expected it on my old one!

I have been living (at least partially) in boxes for 2 1/2 years.  I am so tired of it.  I'm also a little sick of hot flashes.  Our old dog, Moe (almost 14 yrs Lab mix) got up on Friday and started to bleed from his rectum.  It was a significant amount of frank red blood.  We took him to the vet (yes, I know that I am married to one but he has only worked with horses since 1986) and he has anal gland carcinoma.  The Dad and I have agreed on no heroic treatments or invasive diagnostics.  We will celebrate his 14th birthday on August 24th, if he is still comfortable at that time and wait for him to let us know when he no longer is.

Big Sister has a friend whose family are avid scuba divers.  She took the class last semester in college and was certified so she is in Grand Cayman diving with them.  I can't believe what a wonderful opportunity that is for her.  Little Sister is considering going off seizure meds if her EEG comes back clean.  We have done this before and she had a really big seizure before her 16th birthday.  It is a little nerve racking before her first semester of nursing school.  But, it is her decision and she'd really like to get off the meds if possible.

The Son is still working.  We are trying to connect with him as much as he wants within the boundaries we've set.  Figuring out how to keep connecting was exhausting so I am waiting to see how things play out organically.  Unconditional love is a hard thing to figure out in practice. I finally realized that I was still in fixing mode as I worked so desperately to decide what route to take.  Maybe I will learn to wait on my son and the plan God has for him....maybe.

Praying for the soul of Henry, your loved ones and mine.



Kelly Bea Rutherford said...

Happy Closing and Hugs on Moe! Will be praying for a safe trip for the big sister and that whatever little sister decided goes well. Always praying that Henry continues to heal...

Annette said...

So much wonderful life goes on all around us in addition to the addict's. I am glad you are seeing all of the good stuff in your life.

Letting go and minding ones own business is hard work. lol Especially when it is a learned behavior. A sweet Alanon old timer said in a meeting one night...."wait for the question." I remind myself of that all the time. Let her ask me for what she wants or needs. Don't try to anticipate and figure out and meet her needs without being asked.

Hattie Heaton said...

Annette, thank you for the advice. I have to chair the Al Anon meeting tonight and you just gave me the topic....wait for the question!!! I love it. Kelly Bea, you are a great girl... go see your neice and Mom. They are gifts from God to you and imperfect just like me and you. Cherish what you have while you have it.